Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
