I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
