He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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