You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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