the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
