ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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