You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
