you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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