we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
