Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize