1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
