Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
