question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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