When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Randomize
