I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
