So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
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