also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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