I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
handjob tips. give me some.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
