maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
