you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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