Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
