oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
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