I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
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Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
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She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I am one with the molecules
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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