here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
