I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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