Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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