I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
