I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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