Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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