Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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