I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
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