Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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