I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
