you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
