Your favorite bartender is back from prision
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
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