that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
