No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
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