Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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