Whoa Z and x make the same sound
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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