like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Randomize
