Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
