Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Randomize
