so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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