your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
