there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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