you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
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