okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
