honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
Randomize
