What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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