Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
