I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
do herpes really smell.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
